Thursday, March 3, 2016

Thursday's ThoughtsAs



You are probably not surprised to read that my head is spinning.............the thoughts spin around faster and I can't stop them. Thank God I have been getting some sleep, although 8 hours in a row would be nice. When I wake up in the wee hours I try to lay very still and not open my eyes.
I'm tired, it's an effort to talk and even to write this. It's hard to concentrate.
Breathing is best when sitting upright.
My legs ache, but my back has been OK.
I can't wait for bedtime.
Yesterday I had a medical port put in, it all went well. A port is a good thing, it saves your veins. 
Tomorrow I will start taking an oral chemo pill (actually 5 of them) with a list of side effects as long as my arm. *sigh* In fact the pharmacy sends a package of products along for the side effects. 
Tomorrow I am having a CT scan on my liver........and I have to drink 2 bottles of a barium 'shake'. I am afraid the anti nausea meds won't help............mornings are the worst. I can eat in the afternoon. 
My fight mode comes and goes. 
All I can think of is my grandchildren. And I feel so bad for the those who read this. This is an honest documentation of my journey.
Thanks again to my  friends who are taking care of me, for the prayers, for the treats, for the kind words.

11 comments:

  1. You are a very strong woman or you could not have written this post.
    Your grandchildren love you.
    You are a funny and kind woman who is dealing with a lot right now.
    Your family understands and will be there for you.
    I hope you can keep the nausea at bay. That's the worst.
    Hopefully you can get some rest and find a way to relax.
    Take care & stay strong. Praying for you.
    Monica

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  2. Your strength shines through your posts. Although, you may not realize that you are fighting, you are. You are attempting to beat this disease and win this battle! I for one must say that I wish you the best with this struggle and will be looking forward to the day that you again post that you are cancer free!

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  3. Keeping a journal is a blessing....and something to look back upon :)
    Keep strong and love your family.
    deb

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  4. I came over from Deb's blog and want you to know that I will keep you in my prayers. Sending you lots of gentle hugs too, Diane

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  5. I am praying for you Linda! I'll be right here following you on this journey! BIG HUGS and continued prayers from my heart to yours!

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  6. Linda, thank you for sharing your journey. I'm keeping you in my prayers daily. I wish there was something I could do or say to give you comfort but I don't have any words right now. If you want to know why, read my last two blog posts. https://pinkinmyrearview.wordpress.com I love you my friend and I hate you're having to go through this again. God be with you and give you peace and comfort. p.s I'm not going to be on Facebook any more so I'll have to keep up with you through your blog or if you want to email me. I know you still have it.

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  7. Linda- I continue to pray for you. I know how tough your journey is. You are strong and I know you are going to give this darned cancer a run for its money. Sending you a hug and a prayer. The port makes things much easier. We have them spray it three times with the numbing agent before they access it each time. That seems to work pretty good. xo Diana

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  8. As I go about my day I often stop and think of you and say a prayer that God will give you the strength to get through this. Blessings to you and your family.

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  9. Oh my Linda...I was thinking the worst was behind you. I'm so sorry you are feeling so terrible, and I think it's very good that you are journally your journey. It will be a legacy for years to come to your children and grandchildren. You will be in our prayers. Blessings

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  10. An honest heart expressed brings healing. Share, share, share. The good and the bad. We and even God can handle all the crap!

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